Observe yourself
One of the key ways to take care of well-being is to use small rules, micro-habits and supportive routines that help you function better. It is worth developing the ability to observe what you experience. In both difficult and better moments, you can use the simple practice of answering four questions:
- What do I feel in my body right now?
- What emotion am I experiencing at this very moment?
- What am I thinking about now?
- What do I need in relation to this?
Such questions can help you recognise your emotions, understand their sources, and take better care of your needs.
Imagine the situation of a woman who has been feeling tension and discomfort since the morning of Friday. However, she is too busy to pay attention to her condition and reflect on it. She hurriedly walks her dog, helps her children get ready for school and gets ready to go to work. Busy, every now and then she yells at her daughters and curses when she accidentally hits the edge of a table in a hurry. All this time, she feels an unpleasant tension inside her, which fuels her anger. “I got up in a bad mood today,” she tells her daughter. However, it would only take a moment of concentration to mindfully ask herself a question: “What do I really mean? Why am I feeling and behaving this way?” She would then be able to answer the above questions, gaining better insight into her condition.
- What do I feel in my body right now? “I feel pressure in my stomach”.
- What emotion am I experiencing at this very moment? “I’m stressed and scared”.
- What am I thinking about now? “I’m thinking about an upcoming conversation with my boss – I suspect he may accuse me of a serious error in the last report”.
- What do I need in relation to this? “I wish I could stop yelling at my children, because I know they are not responsible for my bad mood. If I don’t stop treating them this way, I will feel guilty later. I also need someone to talk to, to offload, and get an objective outside opinion. Maybe on my way to work I can call a friend and tell her about the situation? This will help me get my emotions out of me and prepare to talk to my boss. Yes, this is what I’m gonna do!”
Such an analysis can help the woman understand that her emotional state has a specific cause. Observing emotions and the accompanying sensations in the body teaches us to recognise our own feelings more quickly, so we are less lost in the – often complex – world of emotions. Understanding them helps to see and satisfy the need behind them.
Linking feelings to thoughts is extremely helpful because it makes us realise that the various emotional states we experience are directly related to what we think. And we can work on our thoughts – create and change them, which gives us a greater sense of agency. Such a process helps effectively reduce daily stress levels. Sometimes the four-step method is referred to as “the ability to be one’s own therapist”, because it allows you to be more in touch with your inner self and increases your self-awareness.
Take care of your loved ones’ smiles
One of the pillars of well-being is good relationships with others. As social beings, we need to surround ourselves with kind people who support us in difficult times. Social support means help and comfort, especially in stressful and challenging situations. This can come from family members, friends, neighbours, colleagues or support groups, and can take various forms: ad hoc, practical help (e.g. relieving the burden of household chores), material assistance (e.g. financial support) or emotional support, giving us a sense of appreciation, acceptance and understanding.
Social support is key to protecting mental health, especially during periods of severe stress. It helps reduce its perceived level by creating a sense of security and belonging. When you know you can count on the help of loved ones, your perceived stress level decreases. This is because the mere presence or availability of social support can make stressors seem more manageable.
To strengthen relationships and a sense of security, it is worthwhile to nurture close ties on a daily basis by:
- surrounding yourself with friendly people,
- taking an interest in the affairs of loved ones,
- celebrating small daily successes together,
- appreciating and thanking loved ones even for small gestures,
- showing attentiveness in relationships.
This way of caring for ties allows them to be nurtured and maintained. As a result, it increases your sense of security – you know that you will get the support you need in difficult times.
Remember to get a good night’s sleep
During the day we are active – achieving goals, reacting emotionally to various situations, expending energy – whereas at night we gain strength for the next challenges. Researchers agree that recovery during sleep is crucial to our well-being. An adequate amount of quality sleep helps the brain process emotions and recover from the hardships of daily life. Insufficient sleep, in turn, is strongly linked to increased stress and mental health problems. Therefore, it is a good idea to observe the quality of your sleep and react if the need arises. The quality of sleep is positively influenced by:
- going to bed and getting up at the same times,
- adequate length of sleep (about 7-8 hours),
- avoiding monitors that emit blue light 2 hours before bedtime,
- cool bedroom temperature,
- calming emotions before bedtime,
- darkened bedroom.
Fight stress with routine
Daily routine and planning ahead are effective strategies to support well-being during emergencies. They provide structure, predictability and a sense of control, which is especially valuable in times of uncertainty and stress.
Establishing a daily routine can significantly reduce feelings of anxiety. Research shows that routine provides us with greater composure, especially when the environment becomes chaotic. The lack of routine, on the other hand, can cause difficulty concentrating and amplify the stress caused by uncertainty. For example, following consistent bedtimes, meal times and work times helps maintain mental stability and productivity by occupying our minds and reducing thoughts of stressors.
Performing daily activities “on autopilot” – that is, without having to think about every step you take – relieves burden on the mind and gives you a moment’s respite. It is therefore beneficial to introduce healthy habits in the form of small steps and gradual evolution rather than revolution. If you think that any of the suggestions presented here could support you on your way to better well-being, try slowly introducing them into your life.
References:
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